Is there a moment you want to break your daily routine?
Is there a moment you want to stay away from everyone you know?
Is there a moment you want to escape from your conform zone?
Is there a moment you start questioning yourself if the world you are living in is actually not real?
Is there a moment you just want to take a break from literally everything in your current life?
The answer for me is “YES”. Everything just appear at the exact moment, it was just perfect.
Back in 2015, this exact moment came in to my life, I couldn’t help but wonder,
What does the world look like out there, and I want to discover so badly.
I went to a book store in Guangzhou, and the book cover of Julia Roberts sitting on the bench and eating ice cream (back then I didn’t know it’s called Gelato) – and the book title is “Eat, Pray, Love”.
Maybe I was too young to understand this word “Pray” back then, but somehow by only reading the cover of this book, it attracts me.
Only when you are ready (not only saying that you are ready, but you need to be 100% ready from your action), your actual behavior tells you even when you don’t say it out loud. There is always a first step, by selecting the new destination, I went completely random for my life-time first solo trip – I closed my eyes and pointed in a location on the world map, and here it comes, my very first destination – Chiangmai, Thailand.
I whispered, I want to take the exact routine as Elizabeth Gilbert, - Go to Italy, Bali and India. Maybe I wasn’t ready or maybe it’s not the right moment for me yet, I’ve travelled to other destinations before actually going to these three places.“Am I ready?” – Yes I am (in 2017, I said Yes to Bali).
“Something not having plans are even better than a planned journey”. I was searching for an Ashram in Bali, 3 days before departure, I’ve found my place – Anand Ashram.
I wasn’t sure what I expect from the ashram, but my intuition told me that “Darling, it’s the time”. Human often are strange to me (I mean for those unexplainable behavior or random thoughts just kick in to your mind), you start laughing, crying or yelling for no reasons.
A very low but powerful voice surrounded by me (it was Anand Krishna), my eyes are all closed, sitting in a traditional Buddhist Lotus position, I could feel my tears slowly dripping from my cheek – I never felt so happy and I smiled.
I often ask this question “what’s the definition of happiness in one word?” “Free” – In Bali.Like I mentioned before, I don’t know what to expect from this trip, in the end I started to realize “Life is a journey, home can be anywhere as long as you are there”.
“Everyone should have a love affair in Bali”, as a travel beginner, you might have the fantasy of meeting the love of your life while you are travelling. “Things happened when you are least expecting it”, The harder you tried, the more difficult you might not get anything out of it. I did met many interesting people along my journey, I did had some special connection with someone, but deep in my heart I know it’s not going to last. “You have to take everyone you met in the journey as your teacher” – exactly, when you started travelling, your horizon gets wider, and you can probably see things further.
Memories last for a lifetime, it’s not possible to remember every single details of certain events, the major events happened and it last for long, you might also experience some life-changing events while travelling. Definitely travelling is not a competition, it doesn’t matter how many countries/places you’ve visited, I love to go back to the same places over and over again. “Same place, different times, different feelings”, it depends on the timing, the people you met, the certain status you had in the exact moment etc.
Few months after back from Bali, I “won” a lottery – A chance to go to Italy. I was in wine industry for total 5 years, and I also got the Sommelier certification, Thanks to Vinicio, and I got this chance in my hands to travel in Italy. First time in Europe, with my customers, was not easy at the beginning, I’ve realized this trip is not for leisure but work, somehow I’ve found the perfect balanced in between.
Wineries, Tuscan sun, authentic Italian food, amazing wines and good company, what else I need to ask for? I fell in love with Italy at the first sight, and I travelled back and forwards in the coming years. New Year in Roma, Vinitaly in Verona, wandering around in Montepulciano, cycling along the Ticino river to Milano and moving around with the Van.
It seems just like yesterday, I use my very limited Italian language skills to go around Tuscany, I had many conversations with local people, trying to understand and to be understood. Using paper map without phone GPS walking in each streets of Roma, Via Napoli, Via Firenze, Via Venezia… I do enjoyed so much in this foreign land when the first time I set foot on it.
In Italy, I’ve encountered these two amazing persons – Luigi and Marco. They were definitely in my chapter later on. Tuscan stories in Il Falconiere, beautiful encounter because of cinghiale, lots of wines in Verona and a phone call “accident”, it opens up my next chapters. “The only person you are destined to become is the person you decide to do”. There might be a destiny, but life always gives you a chance to make your own choices. Distance can be an issue for many things in life, it just can’t be all. You might find an excuse not to try or not to move forward, Again, it’s your own decision. “Un treno non passa due volte” Opportunities are right in the corner if you really want to catch it, you can reach always reach out for it.
I was telling myself for many years that I needed to visit India. And to experience the “Vipassana Meditation” in India. “Life is a marathon not a sprint, you will always get to wherever you need to in the time that’s right for you”.
Back in book “Eat, Pray, Love”, there’s a chapter about ashram in India “Waking up early at dawn, meditating for more than 10 hours a day, completely in silence”, also another chapter in the US, “sitting with group of people and singing with joy in Sanskrit”.
Making a decision like this isn’t easy, imagine myself sitting in silence for 10 days in a remote place, no phone, no books, not even writing. Mental and physical body is being tested in such frigid highlands. Breaking ice to get water, sleep with multiple layers of warm clothes, get yourself ready at 4:30am to start the day..
“I am not a quitter and I can do it”. The first 3 days were very difficult, (Don’t you ask for a change and break your daily routine? It brings me to a completely different world – the world only belongs to myself), there are times I didn’t want to go the meditation hall at all, but the volunteer in the center really helped me with all those difficulties by ringing bells just next to my ears. (at the beginning really I don’t understand why she pushed me so much especially we all signed up at our own wills, but in the end I am really appreciated for her to take me from the ground).
At the beginning of the Covid pandemic, I stayed in India for 40 days. In every darkness there’s always a light, I was lucky to travel in India freely, and I have to say, all those bad news about India from the social media, there are all stereotypes. You only understand when you are part of the story and situation.
You can be happy when you don’t suffer from hunger, you don’t need to compare with those who are better or wealthier than you, there are still people who’s going through a worst time.
Following with the flow, I’ve reached Dharamshala where I actually found my peace. There’s also a random thought came to my mind, I wanted to be the volunteer there to teach English. (I will go back for it!). I did my nose piercing there (I’ve wanted to do it long time ago, again, when the time is right, you do it). First time I encountered Tibetan there, and it plants a seed deep in my heart and urge me to visit Tibet after my trip in India.
Camping for the first time in the Himalayas (Mount Triund), caught by the strong wind and heavy snow. Searching for a place where have hot shower after ten days not having shower at all. Facing challenges due to the card issues, aggressive street dogs and much more. I’ve realized nothing is permanent, there will be always a way out.
“Annica, Annica, Annica”